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APPENDIX
THE
ABC OF SEX
Art
and technique
Angel
- Anxiety
Clitoral
Stimulation - Contraceptives
- Coitus
Disease
- Dissatisfaction
Ejaculation
- Erogenous Zones
Fertilization
- Finger/Hand use
- Fraenum
Games
- G-spot
Hermaphrodites
- Homosexuality
- Hygiene
Irritations
of the Glans
Lubrication
- Latin
Lover
Menstruation
- Minors
Oral
Variety
Penetration
- Penis Size -
Perversions
- Pornography
- Post-coitus Depression
- Prostitutes
Sensitive
Spot - Sexual
Violence - Sodomy
- Suspence
The
position of the Cat
Virgin
Zen
Angel
At times men look for an angel for the heart and a slut in bed.
It is clear that it's a sign of confusion, fear of sex and love.
Relax and understand that physical pleasure is a divine miracle
and love is indispensable.
Anxiety
Men feel anxious because they are afraid that in the end "you
won't be willing". Do something to him right away that will
leave him without any doubts. In this way, he'll relax and you will
both be able to act in a more natural, more human way.
Clitoral
Stimulation
We have already said that it makes no sense to indicate a technique.
But it is possible to provide a few ideas. Stimulate the clitoris
with a fingertip wet with saliva. Stroke it up and down, pressing
on it rhythmically (and gently). Take the whole clitoris and the
surrounding area between the thumb and forefinger (as if you are
giving it a pinch) and gently masturbate it. Stroke it with the
middle finger while the forefinger and ring finger stroke along
the sides of the large lips. Squeeze the clitoris and the large
lips scissors-like. Stimulate the anus and the clitoris while penetrating
the vagina with a finger. Apply rotating pressure with the palm
of the hand on the whole area. Explore it millimetre by millimetre
ever so slowly.
Contraceptives
Women have few fertile days. You can calculate which ones and therefore
know when you can make love without taking any precautions. But,
in practice, there are sudden changes and special cases, so that
only the days of the menstrual period are really safe. You must
however keep in mind that sperm can survive for more than 24 hours.
The withdrawal method is unsafe because it doesn't prevent emissions
of seminal fluid which could be sufficient in any case for fertilization.
Even vaginal cleansing and spermicides are unreliable methods.
The IUD (intrauterine device), the diaphragm, the condom and the
pill are the only safe methods. The IUD is a small copper coil inserted
in the uterus that prevents the egg from effectively settling. If
you choose it, make sure that it has a very soft little string as
this string remains hanging in the vagina and it can be very annoying
for your partner. The diaphragm is instead a little plastic cup
or cap that, filled with spermicide covers "the neck of the
uterus". In order to make a wise choice, it is worth going
to a gynecologist.
If it's your first experience, it's better not to add the fear of
an unwanted pregnacy to your anxiety. Obviously, this particularly
concerns girls who would be better off starting relationships with
the assurance of a couple of months of the pill before moving on
to more complex contraceptives.
Coitus
The penis penetrates the vagina. Or, the vagina swallows up the
penis.
Disease
The nightmare of the century. And there's not only AIDS, but also
syphilis, gonorrhea and "cockscomb", not to speak of fleas
and crabs. But things are not as serious as they may seem. Make
love without a condom only with your steady partner and convince
him to do the same. It's one thing if he is unfaithful to you, but
it's worse if he also infects you. Those who can't tolerate the
condom should limit themselves to caresses that, unlike all the
rest, aren't infective (provided that there aren't any cuts). Remember
that hygiene is a fundamental matter. Making love with clean people
who have no sores in the genital area is a primary rule of caution.
Dissatisfaction
It seems that the majority of men are dissatisfied with how they
make love. If they tried harder, they could improve, but they lack
the will power.
Ejaculation
Act of emitting seminal fluid. At times you have an ejaculation
without an orgasm (that is, everything functions normally with erection
and emission but you don't experience the peak of pleasure. Experts
on sex say very little, if anything, about this.
Erogenous
Zones
The human being is one whole erogenous zone, from head to toe. Then
there are some zones that are more erogenous than others.
Fertilization
The male emits a seminal fluid during orgasm that contains the heroic
sperm which, if it ends up inside the vagina, tries to swim up to
the uterus and there... zap! It fertilizes the famous female egg.
There is no other way to have a baby. Sperm is unable to do anything
if it is not put in exactly the right place (inside the cleft).
Finger/Hand
Use
Hold in the hand, place your hand on top (or vice versa), stimulate,
graze, caress, press, massage, fondle, feel (with the palm of the
hand, with the back, with the fingers, with the fingertips), scratch,
scrape, claw, rub, titillate, pinch, grasp, constrict, squeeze,
pull, stretch, open, explore, handle.
Fraenum
The sliding skin of the penis that gathers under the glans, forming
a sort of thin thread. This joining more or less represents the
area of greatest sensitivity. Some men have a very delicate or 'short'
fraenum, a fact that prevents the skin from sliding down, leaving
the glans exposed. This can cause coition problems and risks of
painful and bloody tearing. If you have similar problems, it is
necessary to undergo a surgical operation. (For this rather common
problem and to facilitate hygiene, some people resort to circumcision;
that is, the removal of the part of the skin that covers the glans:
the prepuce).
Games
Playing and laughing are two fundamental things in sex and in life.
Unfortunately, sexual games can't be learned from books. They are
to be invented each time in a different way depending on the days,
situations, desires and love affairs. Playing blindfold, playing
at doctors, having a bath, following each other, strip-teasing,
pretending to sleep, covering each other with whipped cream, touching
each other everywhere but there, dressing up as pirates, playing
spin the bottle, expressing a wish, taking turns being the slave,
feeding each other, looking at each other, using an icicle, cream,
fruit, a hot wet towel, a feather, puffing from a straw, passing
champagne from mouth to mouth, tickling each other, painting each
other, taking photos of each other, doing it at the movies, in the
elevator, on the train.
G-spot
The mythical G-spot, discovered by the Americans a little before
the landing on the moon, a miraculous place of vaginal pleasures.
Repeated and colossal orgasms. It is located in the upper part of
the vagina. By slowly inserting a finger, with your fingertip turned
towards her belly, you will find half way - between the opening
of the divine hole and its depth - a slight depression, just as
big as a fingertip. By stroking this spot with a circular movement,
you obtain pleasurable sensations. Not all women however go wild
about this "G"-spot. It's worthwhile anyway conducting
a survey. If you find a girl who has a very sensitive G-spot, she'll
be very happy about it.
Hermaphrodites
A human being equipped with complete, perfect and functional sex
organs doesn't exist and never has. What exists are legends, photomontages,
prostheses and some cases of abnormal development of the clitoris
and the large lips or cases of malformation that may create illusions.
The rest is nonsense. No one has ever succeeded in impregnating
himself.
Homosexuality
There are those who at times prefer the same sex. This may happen.
If it doesn't happen to you, don't worry about it. If it happens,
don't worry about it. The only danger is if it becomes a source
of anguish. And anyway, even the other sex has its positive sides.
We are made in two different ways precisely so that we can love
each other better.
Hygiene
Hygiene is essential in sex. Not to smell, not to have bad breath,
not to go off with others when you have contagious infections these
are simple matters of civilisation and good taste. Washing yourself
carefully after sex, especially with occasional partners is indispensable
(use special bacterial but not irritating soaps). It is absolutely
essential to wash yourself after anal sex too or when you have a
period. Another fundamental rule of hygiene is never to penetrate
the vagina after anal penetration because this can cause vaginal
infections. If you find rashes, swelling and sores in the genital
area, see a doctor right away.
A strong itching in the pubic area can instead mean crabs. Small
insects, like little spiders. They appear as a prominent little
stain at the base of a hair and are detected as microscopic 'transparent
little pearls' (eggs) stuck among the hair. To eliminate crabs,
use a special soap and powder. The operation should be repeated
a couple of times, scrupulously following the time interval between
one application and the other suggested by the manufacturing company.
Irritations
of the Glans
The skin of the glans is very delicate. In fact, the 'sliding' skin
of the shaft covers the tip of the penis that is almost always protected
and is very sensitive. (Circumcised men don't have this sliding
strip of skin. Their glans is always exposed and therefore less
sensitive). At times rashes can be caused by sexual rubbing or clothing.
Lubricating with balsamic oil or cream can be of some use. Even
the essential oil of lavender gives good results, but it burns a
little. These irritations may cause burning after contact with the
secretions of the vulva. Often this is due to poor hygiene or to
the habit of not drying the penis carefully after washing. Too much
moisture in fact fosters these irritations. Dry yourself with care.
Lubrication
Smoothness goes hand in hand with pleasure. Lubricating is at times
a good way to make touching pleasant. Generally, it is more pleasurable
to be touched in the sensitive areas if they have been well lubricated.
This is particularly true for penetration. You must wait for her
to become wet or, if you can't resist, wet her with saliva or with
something else that is lubricous and appropriate (non-irritating,
that is). Don't use petroleum-base lubricants. They are carcinogenic.
Latin
Lover
Is a man who has had three thousand women a super macho? No, he's
impotent. He lacks the capacity to desire sex for more than an hour.
It's crazy. He's all right the first time, then he's no big deal.
It's after the hundredth night of sex that you get to know each
other a bit. Whoever has sex with a woman just once is missing out
on the best.
Menstruation
Approximately every 28 days the woman is fertile for about 2 or
3 days. That means that an egg is ready to be fertilized (in the
uterus). Every 28 days the non-fertilized egg is expelled with a
small loss of blood that lasts a few days. Then a new egg is released
from the ovaries and takes its place in the uterus.
Menstruation starts around the age of 11-15 and ends at the age
of 45-50.
Minors
Periodically, weekly magazines are very interested in the fantasies
and sexual practices of minors. This helps sell more newspapers.
Oral
Variety
Sucking, stroking with the lips or with the tongue, licking, suckling,
slurping, biting, blowing a raspberry, breathing in, puffing, spraying
with sounds (vibrational sexuality), warming in the mouth, squeezing
in the mouth.
Penetration
We have said that doing it slowly is better and remaining still
is wonderful. We have talked about contact between the man's pubis
and the woman's clitoris and of the circular movements made with
the penis inside instead of the usual in and out movements (the
position of the cat). One more thing can be said: when making love
we focus too much attention on the genital area. Try instead to
copulate with your whole body. Try making every part of you come
into contact with every part of your partner. Touch each other with
your feet, legs, chest, arms, hands and face. Accompany pelvic movements
with your whole body, rubbing against each other smoothly and gently.
In this way sex becomes an all-embracing experience. Pleasure moves
from the genital area to the rest of the body. Movement and warm
skin against warm skin increases the number of sensations, becoming
a box of orgasmic resonance. Feeling energy being released in every
cell.
Penis
Size
If it is smaller than 3 centimetres when erect it is very small.
If it is longer than 24, it is very big. Around 10-20 is normal.
In all three cases, you are able to give complete pleasure to a
woman, providing that you are sensitive and know how to love.
Perversions
There are millions of ways of making love. There are those who love
it regularly, those who love it gay, those who love anal sex, wild
sex, group sex, there are those who are fetishistic, sado-maso,
the show-off, the cerebral, the complicated... There are those who
collect lovers, those who collect underwear, those who want to do
it in all the Kamasutra positions, and those who are only able to
do it in the elevator... There are those who simply want to try
everything in life. I believe that everyone is free to have fun
as he or she wishes and that being moralistic is stupid. I believe,
however, that to try everything is impossible. There's no time:
you live only once. You must however choose at least one route to
explore. I believe that in the end the simple things satisfy us
the most. Hugging, touching, kissing, rubbing, and fucking are an
immense territory to travel in and explore.
If you really go wild for perverse little games, enjoy them without
feeling guilty, just don't harm anyone. However, between one perversion
and another, treat yourself to a more homely game: a shampoo, a
little cat, a massage, and a footbath. It's not "Basic Instinct"
stuff, but I guarantee you that when your feet are relaxed and happy,
you feel great (especially if you have worn shoes with 15 centimetre
heels and studded boots all day). Experience the greatness of the
primary sensations. Do only what you really like doing and do it
to the full.
Pornography
That seen in movies and magazines is generally an exultation of
the ramrod. Technically, the sex practised in them is a mad slamming
of sexual organs. Stuff that just reduces you to pulp. Pleasure
is something else.
Post-coitus
Depression
Type of malaise that affects those who have not fully enjoyed making
love. For many it's the rule and there are those who still maintain
even today that it is a physiological matter. Nonsense!
If a person is comfortable with sex, after an orgasm he/she has
a period of ecstatic abandon and physical, psychic and emotional
relaxation, followed by a state of gentle euphoria during which
you often have intuitions, ideas, imaginings and flashes of inspiration.
In the end, you fall asleep, you sleep magnificently, or else for
a while you enjoy a state of psychophysical vitality and well-being.
Prostitutes
Many are convinced that prostitutes are very good at making love.
Wrong. Prostitutes generally do everything badly and in a hurry.
Sensitive
Spot
Under the glans, in the lower part of the penis starting from the
fraenum is the spot utmost sensitivity in the penis. This spot is
so rarely taken into consideration that there isn't a name for it
in the English language. We have decided to call it "Arthur".
Sexual
Violence
Whoever commits an act of violence is incapable of feeling sexual
pleasure. It's a peculiar form of male frigidity that leads to an
aggressive neurosis that doesn't provide pleasure but only paranoiac
satisfaction. More than being criminals, they are sick men who suffer
in a disturbing way from emotional impotence and mental and physical
insensitivity. I'm against violence, but I believe that if you catch
them in the act, it is impossible to resist the instinct to kill
them instantly. They commit an irreparable crime against life and
love.
Sodomy
Anal penetration. Condemned by the church. Some people like it enormously
and in fact at times it is pleasurable. It is also delightful at
times to be touched in the surrounding areas while you are doing
other things.
Suspense
Women love suspense, waiting. Wait, simmer them on a low fire, stop,
wander, wait for them to be the ones to implore you. You need to
be patience and to have nerves of steel. (Petrus Boonekamp, for
the man who never has to ask).
The
Position of the Cat
She underneath, he on top. His pubis is placed with all his weight
on her clitoris, (the man does not support himself with his arms,
he lies completely on her body. fig. 1). There is no in and out,
only rotating, horizontal, vertical or crosswise movements. In this
way, the penis "plunges" in the vagina without ever coming
out, not even by a millimetre. Every now and then you stop and savour
the simple contact. Or you move by massaging each other, rubbing
with your body against your lover's body. Or only she moves, from
underneath, swinging herself like a ship as he lets himself be rocked
inert. Divine. Especially on a water bed because it accentuates
the slow swinging and favours co-penetration and body to body contact.
Virgin
A person who has never had sexual intercourse that involves penetration.
Virgin girls have a membrane called the hymen that tears
the first time. Sometimes this involves a small loss of blood. Long
ago in some Italian regions, it was a custom to expose the sheet
stained with blood at the window the first day after the wedding.
This gesture meant that the bride was a virgin and the man virile.
It was certainly an extremely idiotic custom, above all because:
1. Many women don't have the hymen or it's so fine that the rupture
doesn't involve a bleeding tear. Many others tear the hymen involuntarily
by touching or washing themselves.
2. If a man acts with a bit of care, and having lubricated the opening
with saliva or other, he can very well attain a defloration without
pain or bleeding. Finally, why do you have to have yourself deflowered
the first time? Why not prolong this emotional experience? Do it
a little at a time, to be continued. Insert it a bit until the hymen
stretches, and then remain like this enjoying this beginning without
inserting it further. Do this a couple of times and arrive at complete
penetration only after a few days. There will be more suspense,
more waiting and more pleasure. From a technical point of view,
the ideal position to obtain a painless defloration is with the
girl lying on her back and a few pillows under her buttocks. This
way you can get the ideal angle between the genitals. If instead
the rupturing of the hymen during sex scares you, you could very
well do it by yourself with a finger.
Zen
Relax, abandoning yourself to sensations, to perceptions. Listening
in love the long cosmic symphony.
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